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Your Healthy Guide to Role Playing

You can make sex more fun by bringing these ideas, and your own imagination, to bed.

It's exhilarating to shed your everyday self and be someone different and exciting, and it's even more fun to take on that new persona in bed with sex games. Pretending that you're someone else may make you feel less inhibited, more relaxed, and more willing to try something new.

There are lots of sex games you can play, and role-playing is a great place to start. Do you or your partner have a certain fantasy? Start with that.

The Art of Sexual Foreplay

Sex Games: Why Role-Playing?

"Role-playing or game-like fantasies are great tools; they assist in awakening creativity and imagination in the couple," says Evelyn Fisboin, a registered marriage and family therapist intern at the Mind Spectrum Institute in North Miami Beach, Fla. "Role-playing can also help divert from routine sex, and may heighten and enrich sexual relations."

The beauty of role-playing is that you can be anyone you want: anyone you have ever wanted to be, or anyone your partner has always desired. Always had a thing for nurses, secretaries, teachers, or cops? Act out your sexual fantasy with a little role-playing and add some fun and spice to your sex life. With the right partner, you shouldn't be too shy or too nervous to give fun sex a try.

Role-playing and sex games can go beyond just a little talk and pretending — you can dress up in outfits and costumes and act out an entire fantasy or scenario. Start out with something simple, and work your way into more complex role-playing as you and your partner become more comfortable.

Bondage or S&M (sadomasochism) is a fantasy-based type of role-playing in which leather and restraints are often used. Leather can be erotic for many people; so can the idea of bondage and control. However, it's important to make sure both parties enjoy these types of sex games and that each person in the relationship is comfortable with bondage or S&M role-playing.

Keeping Fun Sex and Role-Playing Comfortable

"Couples can make role-playing enjoyable and comfortable by making sure that all fantasies are safe, and no harm is inflicted on either partner,” Fibroin says. “Check in with your partner regularly before and during role-playing to make sure that both of you are in agreement."

It's perfectly healthy to want to explore sexual fantasies, and you should feel comfortable opening up to your partner about what interests you. You should always be respectful and keep an open mind when your partner wants to discuss fun sex and opens up about role-playing ideas or fantasies. Safer sex methods that make both partners feel comfortable can also be part of this conversation.

You may be surprised to hear what your partner wants to do, and it's okay to say that you don't want to do it. You also need to understand how difficult it can be to talk about sexual fantasies, even with a willing partner.

Role-playing, fun sex, and sexual fantasies are a great way to keep sexual magic alive over the years. In long-term monogamous relationships, they can help maintain comfort and affection, while still maintaining the excitement of having "different" sexual partners.

Last Updated: 10/29/2014

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