Updated: Mar 15
Single men please save yourselves!! Read this.
First off guys, I was single in the lifestyle and kudos to you all for trying. I simply didn't have the patience for it. Rejection was never an issue, but begging for sex was. I had no idea what to say or do, "Hey bro can I fuck your wife, I got a big dick" didn't seem to fly in my mind.
Lets start at the beginning:
Get a profile on a lifestyle / swinger / adult dating site. Adultfriendfinder, Kasidie, Swingers Date Club aka SDC. Craigslist / Backpage not recommended, unless your looking for a hooker.
First of all, pay for it. If you're going all in then go all in. The lifestyle isn't cheap and no one likes a cheapskate. Guys you're not going to get laid for free. It won't happen and you know it, so don't fight it.
If you do find what your looking for, you'll be expected to pay for the room, drinks ect. again nothing is free.
Put your best foot forward, not your dick.
Once you've created a profile, post some good (classy) pictures of yourself.
A face pic helps, but you can always create a private gallery if you wish to hide them. A couple or single female WILL ask to see them. Don't say "I have to find one"; it's a turn off. Have them ready to open upon request.
NO DICK PICS. Put them in your private gallery, as with face pics, ONLY show them when you're asked.
Add lots of content; talk about yourself, your likes and dislikes, fantasies ect.
Do not write "I'll fuck your wife for three hours and eat her pussy for three more" Keep in mind in most cases the male half of the couple is reading it and really doesn't care that you're a super stud.
It's better to write "I am looking to try something new, have fantasized about a threesome, I really enjoy oral sex"
Once your profile is ready to go, don't be afraid to make contact with a couple or single female. Scout the site and look for a couple or female that catches your eye.
This part is critical. READ THEIR ENTIRE PROFILE. Do not contact a couple or single female that states "no single males" or "not interested in single males" Just don't do it! Make sure you know what 'they' are looking for and that you are a match before making contact.
Actual messages from single men
"Very sexy..maybe i can be a 3rd wheel for new friends and fun,)"
Strike! This profile had no pictures at all, not really very captivating.
"Hello I'm Scott, how are ya'll?"
Strike! Had a pic, but not working for us, could've put in some effort.
"Hi my name is Mike I'm a laid back guy that's looking to meet more people in the area from the site, I saw your profile and you both seem cool. I'd love to talk more, let me know if your interested in getting to know each other more." Home Run! Interesting with face and body pics, this guy has a shot.
A. Put some thought into what you are going to say.
B. Attach a face picture to your message or have your gallery open,
C. Don't ask to see more pictures of her, or tell them how hot she is. Trust me, they know.
D. Be subtle and intelligent with your words. Don't be a tool.
E. Do not be afraid of rejection or in most cases no response at all, move on.
Getting in to Lifestyle Events aka swinger parties, gang bangs etc.
Have an in:
If you really want to get in, you have to have an in. It's that simple.
We host couples only lifestyle aka swinger events, yet we still have single men attend them.
What? Doesn't make sense. Right?
The men who attend our events are quiet, respectful and are usually spoken for before the event even begins.
The reason is, they usually have a woman by their side or are busy socializing with a couple. They are hardly ever alone.
How they got in?
In most cases they were once part of a couple and then respectively asked if they could attend solo. This really is based on their actions while attending events as a couple. Were they respectful? Social? Have a good attitude? These are all things that a couple or event host considers when taking a chance on a single male, and why they were invited back.
How to get in?
I am not encouraging you to start pestering party hosts; not a good idea. In almost every case, you will be ignored.
Look for events that allow single men. Read the details of the event, I REPEAT, READ THE DETAILS OF THE EVENT. Make sure single men are permitted before you ask.
If the event allows single males, still ask. Don't sign up and expect that gives you an in. Event hosts appreciate courtesy, contact them and respectfully ask. Same as before, make sure you have your face pics open or attached.
Actual message from single men
"Hey how you doing I was interested and was wondering how can I attend my first party something I've never done before and was hoping that you guys gave me an opportunity"
This one got in. He sent a respectful message with no presumptions. He had clear pictures of himself (no dick pics) and his personality profile.
If your invited in:
Follow the rules, dress classy, be respectful, social, don't over indulge and be sure to thank the hosts.
Once you're in you're in:
Once you've made it in to a lifestyle event and you've done the right thing, you will most likely be invited back to the next one.
The other perks are that you will most likely connect with couples and single females, who have their own 'ins' with more exclusive parties and events.
Source: THE DEVIATE NETWORK